Christmas Through The Eyes Of This Atheist

Hello everyone :)

As you probably know, there is now just over one month until Christmas! Now I don't know why, but this year I am actually looking forward to it, when usually I don't really care much.
Christmas for me has never been about Jesus Christ. Never- not even when I still thought maybe God and his son existed. For me Christmas was always, always, always about family and santa.
Before I continue down that path though, let me just say that I hate the commercialisation of the holiday. I get that we all love buying stuff for each other and seeing all the decorations down the street, but does there really need to be sooo much stuff on sale?
I mentioned in a previous post that they (by "they" i mean advertisers and store owners) are trying to make Halloween a "thing" here. We don't celebrate it or whatever, and yet they continue to push it on us. But once they have finished doing that -ie on about November 3rd- they start selling Christmas shit -_-
So for such a looong time already, it feels, i have been seeing Christmas stuff everywhere. I was wondering when they begin advertising in other places, such as America, since they have Thanksgiving to celebrate first. I hate that they try to force the season on people early.
Anyway, back to santa. From an early age I loved Christmas because it was the only time I believed that magical things could happen. When I was really young though, I was terrified of sitting on "santa's" lap in the shopping malls- if you think about it, it is kinda creepy.
My parents always made christmas fun, and here is a rough outline of how the season went for me in years gone by:

Christmas Eve: Most of my large family on dad's side would come down to my city and visit nan. She and her late husband had eleven children all up, nine of which grew up and eight of which are still alive today. Even though some of them lived too far away to make it down, when you factor in spouses and children of those who lived near enough to make it, we form quite a large crowd. I got to see all my loving family again, we shared presents that we couldn't open yet, and i got to eat heaps of junk food. Then when we went home that night we got to open one of our presents early :) One year though, I'm not sure why, we went to church on christmas eve. It was packed and boiling and sooo boring.
Then of course we put out milk and cookies for santa, carrots for the reindeers, and put my sack on the end of my bed (we have no chimney or fireplace, and remember its summer here at christmas)

Christmas Day: Try as I might, I couldn't stay awake for santa, but my sister and I woke up early and went through our presents in our shared room. Then, when it was an acceptable time, we woke everyone else up so we could get more presents! We would see that santa liked his food, and one year there was even "reindeer poo" on our front lawn (my parents got horse crap or something :P).
Then we would sit around the tree and film us opening all the presents and thanking each other. We would play with everything for a while, and then had to choose something to bring with us to play with at nan and pop's.
We had christmas lunch with my mother's parents and my uncle (in later years his partner and their kids too) and we would all sit around and talk for a while while we ate the snakcs. Being young though, i just wanted to get to the presents :)
Presents would be picked at random under their very small tree and handed out until none were left, we'd thank each other, then have lunch. Christmas lunch was the only time we ever said grace- and that was about as much as Jesus had to do with my christmas, except hearing his name in the occasional carol.
After lunch we'd all talk some more and then have desert, and by the time we left I'd usually be a bit sad because I knew the day was almost over, and sometimes the holiday hadn't been as great as I had expected. Then when we got home we would play with our new presents and try to find a place in our room to keep them all.

Boxing Day: After lunch we went to visit my great-grandmother at her house, and see my great uncle and my second cousins, all of whom were much older than myself and sisters. We would spend the whole day in one room, basically, and they would all talk. I never really had anything to talk to them about, and even when I did I couldn't usually get a word in. My parents always told me not to interrupt others, and to wait until there was silence to say what I had to say, but the thing is there was never a moment where someone wasn't talking. Don't get me wrong, I like my second cousins and liked seeing them (although I haven't for years now), but I got bored when I was younger. Furthermore, I felt slightly ripped off that I only got one present from them all day :P I would sit and think of santa flying all around the world delivering presents to kids who were in a different time zone, and envied them for only just beginning their christmas.

And then suddenly the whole holiday was over and it would be a whole year until it came around again- and as a child, a year seems like forever. But as years passed and the routine happened some more, I got used to it and knew what to expect. When I was older I began drawing christmas posters each year, which my mother kept. Other little traditions, like the opening a present on christmas eve, also formed.
Then came the time where santa stopped coming to my house, if you get my drift. I was eleven or twelve, and although part of me had already sort of realised what was going on, when I was told all the magic of the holiday vanished. And sadly, that was what really made me stop looking forward to christmas some years- no santa :P Of course I loved spending time with my family, but the traditions also changed.
My nan was a type 2 diabetic whose condition only got worse as the years went by. Soon she had to move out and into special nursing homes, so there was no more christmas eve party at her house with all the relatives I love most. We did go up to see her a few days after christmas when she was staying with my cousins, and i think we had a slightly smaller party, but things were still changing. Nan died when I was 14.
We still went to my grandparents for christmas lunch every year, but one year we decided to stay home, and instead have them over for lunch. I'm not sure why, and it threw me completely out of whack. Made a nice change though.
Then came the year when my parents were divorcing, and I was worried they would fight over who would get the kids for christmas, or whether we would have some awkward time all together. As it turned out though, my dad didn't make it to christmas; he passed away at the end of september when i was 16. So we had lunch with nan and pop after laying flowers at his grave, and then on boxing day i dont think I saw my second cousins. I can't clearly remember, but I think my sisters and I went up to see my cousins instead while my mum stayed here.
And now for the past three years, I can't fully remember what we've done for the holiday. We still have lunch with my grandparents and now we have small parties with my mum's friends. My sisters and I try to get away to see our cousins too, but we can't always arrange it, unfortunately.
Anyway, no matter what we seem to do on the holiday, I never quite enjoy it or look forward to it as much as I used to. Whether this is because of the changes, or just a general part of growing up, I'm not sure.
And as I grew older, I realised the weirdness of millions of children liking the idea that once a year a fat old man would break into their house, sneak into their room and give them a "present"... :P
But even though I don't believe in the son of god's birth or existence as a whole, i can still enjoy christmas- even without santa. Christmas to me isn't about religion, its about people coming together and giving and receiving gifts with the people they love. And with all the commercialisation of the holiday, I think christmas has long since turned into a time where people celebrate this love more than the birth of a "virgin's son". Jesus comes second to santa and love, it seems.
So this year at christmas, hopefully my sister won't punch me in the gut and make me cry (angry face!) and hopefully they will both be nice to me. Hopefully we get and give the gifts people want, and pretend we can stand each other for just this one day :P just joking, we get along... sort of. I just don't want to get so bored -_-

I hope all my family- and you guys too I guess- enjoy christmas this year. It will be hard to be any worse than some of them :P